People should not be treated like mushrooms. The “mushroom theory of management” is something I have seen practiced in many workplaces and close personal relationships. People in charge or those with important information treat other people like mushrooms by keeping them in the dark and feeding them (lets clean it up a bit) the fertilizer of unreliable or partial information. This amounts to using communication to enhance personal power by withholding significant information from others. Manipulating situations by revealing or withholding information is even more powerful when the uninformed have rights to the hidden information.
This problem is targeted by many procedures for opening communications between people or within groups. At work it may be called “team building;” it may be communication techniques or exercises used at retreats; or it may be a project requiring group decision-making. In court or at work, it may be mediation procedures for resolving disputes. In personal life, it may be pre-marital counseling, marriage counseling, or individual therapy.
In each of these situations, open communication is encouraged as essential. It can also be therapeutic in all of these situations so that, when over, it is seen as a “peak experience” that enhances interpersonal understanding and closeness. In fact, the therapeutic value of open communication can become the main objective that is sought.
The point I will make is that the therapeutic effects of communication are not effective as a goal to pursue. Open communication, and the therapeutic benefits it can bring, works best when communication is improved as a step to achieving some really important objective. The primary measure of success must be reaching that objective, not how people felt about the quality and depth of communication in the process.
Based on personal experience, I believe that accomplishing goals leads to therapeutic benefits beyond the value of communication itself. To show what I mean, let’s look at examples from work, mediation, and personal counseling.
For more than a decade, I was a facilitator or trainer directing “interventions” at retreats, training events, or as part of developing a project team. I was an Organization Development consultant working with top and upper middle managers of a large state agency. There was resistance to interventions by managers (including my own supervisors) and employees who heard about “touchy feely” exercises that would make them emotional in public. Many seemingly innocuous games could be used to get people talking as they followed some basic rules to keep them from blaming others as they expressed their own views.
Time and again, I saw people who feared emotionalism quickly become passionately involved in laying out hurts they had been carrying around for years and asking for more personal understanding from others than they had been receiving. Invariably there were many teary eyes before the end of the process and an immediate afterglow of positive affirmation in the entire group.
When feelings were shared without specific agreements being made on improvements, the situation usually returned to the previous condition within a few days or weeks. Managers sometimes wanted to do follow-up exercises to try to harness the good will that had been experienced, but resistance grew far too strong because of the short-lived success the first time. No one would say anything negative about what happened, but they summed up their feelings with “been there, done that.” It was not good enough to make them want to repeat it.
I soon learned to link communication exercises to negotiating rules to accommodate the most important concerns of work groups. Requiring decisions by consensus in these discussions eventually led to very open expression of concerns and requests for making changes. No one was allowed to dictate, although the supervisor always had veto rights when company policy or other expectations of higher management would be infringed. The result would be trade-offs so that no one got everything they wanted but everyone got enough to feel the situation had improved. The process would be successful as communications were open and therapeutic benefits were felt. But reaching agreements on needed changes and following up with evaluation to insure they were honored perpetuated the benefits of therapy and gained credibility for the process as durable change was experienced.
I began to have so much success with negotiation as part of improving work teams that I decided to become a certified mediator. Over a number of years I worked with courts in 5 counties near my residence and mediated disputes in several state agencies in addition to my own. The goal sought in mediation was to resolve a problem at work or that would bring someone before a judge for a final decision. In both cases, one of the parties to the mediation knew they stood to lose a lot from the higher authority if the mediation failed to resolve important issues. Yet the pressure was never one-sided, because both parties stood to lose something of value if the higher authority made a decision because it could not be handled amicably at a lower level.
Negotiated agreements required both parties to make trade-offs, giving up something of lower personal value to gain something considered more important. Each party had something to gain from the settlement and something important to lose if the agreement were not kept. The result was more amicable settlement of disputes, leading more and more employers and court systems to turn to mediation.
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